It's been a completely shitty day. Arbetsförmedlingen was a complete waste of fucking time, on the way home I got a speeding ticket, one which there's no way I can afford to pay in my current job state. And I'm just left with this completely bitter feeling.

To have someone just be completely rude and blunt, and "out of touch" hurts when you care so much. She's the only one of my friends who has gone out of her way to not give a fuck. Even some of her friends have talked about ways that might keep me here, but not her, oh no. She's the ONE person whom I would listen to over all  others here, but she's too busy doing everything possible to be not there, then when asked about it "oh it wouldn't make any difference anyways"....what a fucking cop out.

For someone who says she cares, and that she was serious about fixing this, she's got a pretty fucked up way of showing it. It's impossible to talk to her, because things get twisted, and then it just becomes a big excuse as to why we don't see each other.

Anyways, enough about her, it's time I accepted that she's going to be who she is going to be, and nothing is going to change that stubborness. To be honest, I got myself into this, she did say when we started dating that she was going to hurt me, but I refused to listen...so if you read this, you're released from it, congratulations, but I don't think it bothers you anyways.

Asides from that, last training at football today, and last match on sunday. Looking forward to the season ending, have lost touch with playing football over the past few months, and pretty much lost all my interest, which for someone who adores football, takes a lot.

Still not much doing on the job front, started applying for jobs outside of Sweden now, which require a swedish speaker, there's one in eastern europe which I'm pretty interested in, so gonna fix up my application for that tomorrow. Might be nice with a change of scenery, without having to go home.

Looking forward to the weekend, after work drinks with Emil, and then out both friday and saturday night to have a blast, and forget the shit that my day-to-day life seems to bring right now.

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